Spa Day

Today I went for a spa treatment. This is very much “not me”. I’m a cynic about these sort of things. “Will give you younger, more radiant skin”, “Will leave you full of energy and refreshed”… These sort of claims make me sceptical. Good food, exercise, sleep and a win on the genetic lucky dip are what give you these qualities, not a mud wrap.

Nevertheless, I’ve just lost two stone (14kg) and I have two more to lose, and I’m at that stage where I look thinner but my skin is sort of saggy, which is a bit depressing, and I thought… What the fuck.

The place I went to is part of a chain, and the spa was very nicely decorated. Also very badly lit, in a deliberate, candlelight sort of way. I’d paid for a body wrap, but found when I got there that it included a facial and scalp massage as well. I suppose you’ve got to have something to do while you lie there covered in seaweed, clay and cling film.

The whole experience was a bit surreal, but I liked it. I’m not the sort of person who’s generally comfortable being naked (except for a pair of disposable pants) in front of a stranger, but it turned out to be fine. You get privacy to get undressed, and it’s so dark anyway that you don’t feel exposed at all.

Basically, you get someone making a fuss of you for an hour and a half. Body brush, rub, wrap, shower, another wrap, another shower, and then firming cream. While the wraps are going on, facemasks and scalp massage. It’s appealing in a primate grooming sense. There’s something very relaxing about another person fussing around taking care of you.

Do I look better? Not sure really. I feel better. I feel slightly pampered, in a good sort of way. I also feel very clean. Of course, that could be the fact that I’ve now had three showers today. But I think the cumulative effect has definitely done something to cleanse/exfoliate. I don’t really think anyone else would notice though, to be honest. Plus my sinuses cleared – I think one of the facials had a eucalyptus smell.

Do I believe the claims now? Did it work magic on my appearance? No, not really. Will I go again? Yes, I think so. When I’ve lost that next two stone, and I want a treat.

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